Baby shopping

Last weekend we finally bit the bullet. We went to The Baby Barn just outside Rugby at the recommendation of a friend. My immediate feeling was of being completely overwhelmed. We walked in and all we could see was buggy's and car seats. What I thought I was after was a travel system - I liked the idea of clicking the baby in and out of the car, into the buggy and off. What I went on to find out was that there are strict recommendations about how long the baby should be in a car seat for and that travel systems have a fairly short period of use. 

Having discovered the above I changed my mind and instead we focussed on getting items that would last. After some debate we decided to get a car seat each and went for the new, top of the range, recaro car seat, which can keep baby rear facing until 4 years of age and and has been highly safety tested. 

The buggy was more complicated. It transpired that no buggy will fit in the boot of my Yaris. We ended up looking at a mamas and papas buggy and an oyster one. In the end we opted for the oyster, which again can last from birth until 3 years and got some accessories for it. 

£1200 later we left, still needing to get a cot/ Moses basket and changing table. 

Shop on! 

3 months to go

The countdown has really begun now. My official due date is three months today. My antenatal class this week was cancelled and I'll be missing next week's as we are going on a last pre-baby break to the wedding of friends in Prague. 

I'm clearly now getting quite big. Everybody I see assumes I'm due imminently and I've had two people now ask me if I'm having twins. There's certainly little doubt that I am actually pregnant! 

Baby continues to wriggle around a lot reassuring me about it's presence. 

This week I finally got around to emptying the bulk of boxes from what will be the nursery. At the same time I'm accumulating more and more baby clothes. I'm lucky that a few friends have recently had children and are passing on their baby clothes. Although we'll buy a few things new I'm happy not to be precious about getting a lot of things as nearly new. Ultimately the baby will make anything we put on it dirty in a matter of minutes. I would rather we spent the money on baby once it's old enough to appreciate things. 

Hopefully my pragmatism will endure once baby arrives. 

My first major purchase

Last night I bit the bullet and for the first time invested 3 figures in baby's future. Last week I visited a friend and her nine-month old and saw a demonstration of her sling. 

For us a sling is as important as a pram as our village location and the dog's love of walking through the fields means that it will be needed every day whereas a pram will only be taken in the car. 

The friend I saw last week has a connecta. Not a brand I'd heard of but seeing her demonstrate it it appeared to be easy to use, can be worn on the back or the front and is suitable from newborn to 16kg. They also come in a range of fabrics although we've opted for the tweed for two reasons - first it is the easiest to get hold of as it is stocked by m&s but secondly James has a love affair with tweed and almost wet himself when I told him it was a possibility. 

I get to collect my purchase tomorrow and have been advised to wear it in a bit before little one makes an appearance. I can't wait. All starting to feel that little bit more real. 

Second antenatal class

Last night was my second antenatal yoga class. There were more of us there last time with five of us. Where the first one was blighted by a cold last night's class was disturbed throughout by reflux. Yet another joy of pregnancy. 

Despite that though I had a really good time. We talked more about labour itself and overall I felt beautifully relaxed by the time the class finished. I just managed to avoid dropping off at the end. 

Antenatal class

On Wednesday evening I had my first antenatal class. I've signed up to the Daisy foundation active mum classes. It's essentially antenatal yoga with a focus on breathing and relaxation techniques. There were only three of us at the class although there should have been six. I'm the least far along of us. 

The breathing and relaxation was great. Unfortunately I had difficulty with some of the positions as I'd managed to come down with a stinking cold and was battling a nose like a tap - here was I thinking that if got over the bugs! 

I'm looking forward to the next few weeks though and whenever my nose allows for it I'm going through the breathing techniques at home. 

Our second 20 week scan

At 22+3 we went for our second 20 week scan. At the first one baby had refused to allow the heart vessels to be seen - a fairly vital element of a functioning body. 

Initially it seemed like we weren't going to have any luck. The first scanner sent us out after some fairly brutal attempts to visualise the necessary. I was told to walk about and have a drink and see if baby would uncurl. 

The second scanner also declared that we had a very 'curled up' baby. She however persisted and after tilting the bed so my feet were way up in the air she managed to see what was needed. Everything present and correct. 

It was lovely to see baby wriggling around again although I'm now feeling plenty of movements throughout the day - they're yet to wake me up yet but I'm sure it won't be long. 

I am now very visibly pregnant. Is it wrong that I'm tempted to tell the next stranger that refers to 'my condition' that actually I'm just fat?

Pink or blue

As I stated previously we had every intention of finding out at the scan what we were having and indeed we now know. We've shared the exciting information with those family and friends we regularly see or speak to but for the rest of the world we'll try and keep it under wraps until baby's here. The only difficulty with that is going to be if I inadvertently use the third person pronoun when writing about baby here. It might happen. Let's see if any eagle eyes spot it. 

From our point of view we're both pleased. As James pointed out the only real surprise would be if it had turned out to be a puppy! Personally I've had a hunch from the start and most people have agreed with my hunch. Only a few people thought the other way, James included, so we'll have to wait until next time around to see if he's right with his guess then. 

Kicking

The kicks started when we were on holiday in Italy. I first felt them when I was 18+4. I was lying on the bed in the afternoon, reading and I could feel the movement. I wasn't 100% certain but over the next few days at the same sort of time and in the same sort of place I could feel them. I've had them every day since, more so in the afternoons and evenings. Now I don't have to be lying down and concentrating on them to feel them and last weekend, on the eve of Father's Day James was able to feel them for the first time. 

It's so exciting feeling the wriggling round inside me and I'm looking forward to the movements becoming even more obvious as baby gets bigger and we get closer to meeting baby. 

The local hospital

It's been brought to my attention over the last week that there are proposals afoot to close the obstetric unit at my local hospital, the Horton in Banbury, and replace it with a midwife led delivery unit there, as well as removing the current paediatric services from the hospital. 

When it comes to my delivery I plan to give birth at the Horton. There are many reasons I've made this decision and I will share them now.

Firstly safety. I am a low risk pregnancy (yay!) but I am also a doctor. As part of my GP training I have attended difficult births as the neonatal doctor, tending to the sick newborn, and as the obstetric doctor, assisting in emergency c-sections and instrumental deliveries. I know from first-hand experience that in even the most low risk of pregnancies things can, and unfortunately sometimes do, go wrong. The consequences of this can be life-altering and life threatening and situations during labour can change in an instant. While I am not a natural pessimist, in fact I would say I am a realist, I would never choose to deliver my baby anywhere that medical assistance wasn't immediately available. If the obstetric team were to be removed from my local hospital I wouldn't countenance delivering there. If I were to encounter a complication (obviously something I hope to avoid) I would be reliant upon an ambulance transfer to another unit - possibly the John Radcliffe in Oxford, a hospital 30 miles away from my home in a very congested location and one which I have previously had cause to complain about as a patient - hardly ideal. During the wait or the transfer either I or my baby could lose our lives. It's unlikely but it's not impossible. For this reason above all others I will be throwing my ever increasing weight behind the campaign to keep the current safe services in place. I also have the option of a midwife led unit about 20 miles away but as they acknowledge their transfer rates for first time mums are between 36- 45% and they have fewer pain relief options available I wouldn't consider this as a first option. 

Secondly convenience - when I go into labour it will be very handy to have a three mile, ten minute car journey, before I'm at the labour ward. Not just then but when I have a young child, knowing that there are local services available to care for them if needed when sick or to attend clinic appointments would be a huge reassurance. The logistics of getting to the two other nearest hospitals, Warwick or Oxford would be very difficult. A town the size of banbury, over 100000 people and growing fast, needs more services rather than fewer and to leave such a wast geographic area as north Oxfordshire without obstetric and paediatric cover would be both dangerous and short-sighted. 

The gender question

It's widely acknowledged now that a baby's gender can be identified with a reasonable degree of accuracy during antenatal scans, most commonly the 20 week scan. 

James and I have been in complete agreement from the start. We want to know. If baby doesn't play ball tomorrow and we can't see then I will have no hesitation in booking a private scan to see if we can find out then instead. 

What has amazed me though, either when I've told people that we plan to find out or they've asked our intention, is the dismay and disappointment expressed by so many at the decision we have made. Ultimately though it is a choice that any parent now is free to make and it is one that we both agree on. Fundamentally it won't change much. It may slightly influence the decor of the nursery - although it will be neutral we might choose wall stickers that reflect the gender. It may influence the colour my mum chooses to knit in and it may influence whether or not I choose to buy a baby dress here or there. Ultimately though I don't like surprises. I know some people argue that it's the wanting to find out that gets you through the labour and the we'd be ruining the surprise to find out earlier. I however feel that we will still have the surprise of finding out tomorrow (although I have been convinced throughout that it's a boy) but we will also then have months of eager anticipation knowing whether or not to prepare for a little girl or a little boy. 

I'll be honest. I've always wanted a girl, much like my mum before me. Interestingly though, not only have I thought from the start that this one will be a boy, but if that is the case I really won't mind. I will love our baby whatever and more than anything I just want the baby to be healthy. James wants it to be a boy because he knows I do still have a small preference for a girl, which interestingly is what he thinks we're having. I guess tomorrow we'll find out who's right. The argument as to how many children we have (currently agreed on two) if we have a boy this time and next is something to be raised in the future! Third time lucky? 

Jet setting fetus

So far our little bump has had a very busy year. Having had a very luxurious long weekend at the ritz in Vienna in March bump's next adventure involved a sumptuous fortnight in Italy, from which we returned just over a week ago. 

In typical me style I started to worry while I was in Italy that I didn't look obviously pregnant and that I hadn't felt movements - albeit I am a primip who hadn't yet reached 20 weeks. However, almost overnight at 18+4 I developed a rather sizeable bulge (for which I definitely blame baby and not an excess of pizza and pasta!) and since that day have been consistently feeling movements - interestingly always in the lower right side of my tummy - I'll be very interested to see if that's where baby's legs are when we have our 20 week scan. 

Bump has one final foreign adventure planned - a trip to the wedding of close friends in Prague in August. After that I think I'll be putting my feet up and waiting for bump to become baby! 

And just in case you think we live a jet set lifestyle I think it's fair to mention that in the six years we've been together Italy was only our second holiday of more than a few days duration (our honeymoon being our first) and we've never been abroad more than once in a year in the past - this year is a bit of an anomaly as we try to cram in some couples time before starting family life. 

The twelve week scan

Our twelve week scan came round at the end of April. James and I went along together and we went to our local DGH. I was very dismayed on arriving to find that photographs from the scan were charged for but neither of us had brought any cash as we hadn't known in advance. Thankfully the kind staff members took pity on us and we came away with two photographs of our baby giant - the scan moved my dates forward by five days and gave us a projected delivery date of 29th October. 

Little baby spent the whole scan wriggling about and I found it surprising to know that it was moving inside me and as yet I couldn't feel a thing! 

The highlight of the scan for me was james' comedown. When I was having the screening bloods done after the scan (thankfully all low risk) we asked if we'd be allowed to find out the gender at 20 weeks. The lady responded that as long as the baby wasn't hiding it's bits they'd be more than happy to tell us. At this point James puffs out his chest and smirks out the statement "well if it's a boy and its related to me there won't be any difficulty there". To my great amusement the instant retort came back that it would obviously be mistaken for a girl. One of the VERY few times I've ever seen my husband speechless. 

Excitement levels

It didn't take too long for the excitement about our impending arrival to kick in. And anything we're feeling is multiplied by four as both sets of our parents are equally thrilled with the impending arrival of their first grandchild. 

James can regularly be seen grinning at my midriff and I feel a warm glow every time I think about the amazing thing that is happening inside me. 

The knitting has already begun. My mum is already on her third article for the baby. Having completed a jacket and a blanket she is know part way through some dungarees. 

Presents have also started arriving from across the world. A Finnish reindeer from a friend of james' (sooo cute) has now been joined by a lion and a lovely knitted hat from a friend and near neighbour. 

From our point of view there's lots to do around the house before little one makes an appearance, most notably the clearing of the future nursery which has been a storage jumble for the last few months. 

It's an exciting time not just for us but for all those around us. :-). 

A worrier

Having spent six months working in an obs and gynae department and seeing things going wrong on a daily basis it's hard to approach my pregnancy with complete optimism and assurance. As such I opted to pay privately for a scan when I was about 7 weeks along. I knew that at that stage a heartbeat should be visible of the pregnancy was viable. 

We went to MUMS in Solihull on a Saturday morning and everything was very straightforward. Within a few minutes of arrival we had seen a heartbeat and a slightly phallic shaped foetus. Importantly we also found out that baby was a singleton as I'm not sure how I would have coped with the idea of twins. 

Exhaustion

Straight after my first virus I was exhausted. More tired than I have every been. It was only a few days later that we went off for a long weekend in Vienna and I found it a chore even putting one foot in front of the other. Despite this we managed to make the most of our time and will have very fond memories of baby's first trip abroad. 

Unfortunately the tiredness is ongoing. While I am now not quite as hopeless I'm still finding that I need early nights and that our full diary of social engagements is starting to take it's toll. In particular i'm generally so tired by the time I go to bed (a few minutes earlier than I used to) that I don't even manage to read. Here's hoping for the sudden energy that everyone promises me is to come! 

Immunocompromise

The very evening I found out I was pregnant I started to come down with my first viral illness. That particular bout last 5 days and saw me retiring to bed with high fevers and only paracetamol in my arsenal for treatment. 

No sooner had I recovered from that episode - exactly four weeks after it started to be precise - I came down with my second virus. This time it was a higher temperature and I ended up going to the GP as a precaution. 

In total I needed five days off work in March, which is five more than I'd had off in my previous six month placement. 

Not and idyllic start to my first pregnancy! 

29th February 2016

Excuse the language but... 'Holy Crap! What have I done?' was my reaction to seeing the second pink line appear on the pregnancy test I'd done at the end of a day at work.

It shouldn't have been a surprise - we'd started 'trying' at the beginning of the year but life had been stressful in the first few months of the year, in large due to the expected death of my Granny earlier in the month. Somehow though I felt very ill-prepared for the forthcoming 9 month journey and beyond.

My immediate reaction was to ring James. I felt it only fair that he be the first to know given that it's his baby too. His response... 'How likely is it that the test is wrong?'. After assuring him that the accuracy is about 99% we completed our working days in shell-shock before meeting at home later in the evening.

 I was desperate to tell my mum so we agreed that the future grandparents would be informed the following day. And thus our journey began...